Saturday Sanctuary

Another week over, another couple of days respite. It's been a while since I wrote anything here. Sometimes it's just very hard to find the place in myself to write from. Since I started sharing the blog, maybe I am too self conscious, wanting to look good, even when I don't feel good!

The truth is that recently my boss has been reading assessments I wrote in November and December and is not always very happy with them. The agency expects an OFSTED inspection any time now and the pressure on us to dot the "i's" and cross the "t's" is so high.

My colleague/ friend I mentioned not too long ago handed in her notice. She doesn't have a job to go to, but with all the pressure and the lack of support she just could not tolerate being scrutinized and judged. It's so hard to see because I know there is another side to the story. Perhaps her work really is not up to scratch. I doubt that very much,having worked with her over a period of 2 years previously and not heard any complaints!  I am not sure my own work is really no better, I may just have had a slightly more supportive manager.  Or because I am older and look like a very typical social worker, I get a bit more rope than my rather more glamorous, younger colleague!

I just wish she (and I) had had a bit more real support. For example, to be sent out with the "best" social workers in our first week or two, (ie those who apparently manage to meet all the deadlines),  to have an induction designed for the job and not a vague, go and read and get on with it sort of thing. After all 5 of us were starting at the same time, it would have been worth planning for us properly! I wish we'd been made familiar with scanning documents so that it was automatic before we ever saw a client. I wish that there was a 1 day training on how to do the initial assessments in the most effective and efficient way.  Instead, what has happened is basically we have been left to sink or swim.

Out of the people who started with me,  my friend has "sunk". I have "sunk", with my head occasionally bobbing up above the water. Another is leaving for family reasons but is clear that she thinks there is a huge management issue.  Another is going to do her level best to get through the probation period, and then will relax. She is angry, disillusioned and taking a good deal of sick leave and all the annual leave she can.

She made the point the other day that everyone is so busy they don't record the extra hours they work. She said that this means there is no evidence for how much we are working, as far as management are concerned. And of course she is right.And the other who started with us is also falling behind, starting work at 5.30 am and working far into the night to try to keep up. This person has a work permit and a loan from the Council so has very limited options. Like at least 6 other social workers out of 14.

It is just mindboggling how the job actually is. The bureaucracy that slows everything down and is so frustrating for clients and staff. On Thursday I got 3 or 4 emails from my manager wanting things added to or changed in some assessments from November. I can hardly remember the cases, now I have to "resurrect" them and do more work, on top of current work............

Thursday was a very difficult day. I felt completely thrown off kilter. With so many urgent things to do, I literally could not think straight. I tried to work faster, and was the last person in the office at 9pm. I did not even notice that it had snowed. I had the thought that I could just have stayed there and worked all night, or been stranded by the snow, unable to get home. No one would have noticed.

Every week or so, there is a list sent round with assessments that are out of date. My name was never on it till after Christmas, now there are 4 or so. Of those, some I have done the required visits but not had time to write up, some I forgot to copy and paste to a sibling.  But with the amount of work coming in now, I do not know how I will catch up.  What to do?

I got home at 10pm on Thursday evening, stressed and tired. I did not sleep well and in the morning really thought about taking the day off sick. But I had an appointment arranged with a reluctant client, one which we had actually discussed and I did not want to risk missing it.  On the way to the train station she rang to say she would not be there. I almost went back home but decided to carry on. I still felt so reluctant to get in that I did go and have a cup of coffee and phoned a social work friend.  Her job is better paid, much less stressful and it is agreed she can work from home two days a week.  It sort of helped to know that a similar team in a different Local Authority is a happy place to work!

When I got to the office at 11 am, ( 2hours Time Off In Lieu) I was told a client had presented herself to a social work office in another area. She had no money for her two children and half term was imminent.  To cut a long story short, my whole day from 11 am to 7pm consisted of dealing with that one situation, with just a few calls on another "old" case, one discussion with a GP about a baby,  and a lunch break of 45 minutes.

The final phone call in relation to the case was from the client I spent most of the day working on so that the case could transfer to the other LA.  If I'd been expecting gratitude I would have been sorely disappointed.  She phoned at 6.30pm basically to demand that she gets reimbursed for a payment she made to a playscheme and to tell me how glad she is that she will be dealing with another Local Authority. Lovely end to the week. And all the urgent things (which are to do with children's lives) which had freaked me out the previous day? Not a chance even to think about them.  But yesterday evening at home I did re do my weekly to do list, so that I can start again on Monday with a bit of clarity.

The inner story though is quite interesting.I've moved it to my ACIM space.

Down to Earth with a Bump...?

It was all going so well! Since Christmas, I had a shift to a new perspective and way of being at work. So different. I was quite at peace and happy that everything was going to work out and it did not matter what happened...so long as I was doing the best I could and trusting in grace to supply the difference.
But yesterday I met my colleague/ friend Y and she was so upset. She has been told by management that she is basically not up to the mark. And I feel disturbed, that she has been given no support, just this cold, dismissive reaction. I know she is working hard. I know also that it's so much easier to criticize and pick out the failings than to be on the front line doing the work.
I feel angry that she is treated this way. And angry that I also got pulled up about having blank sections in my assessment. There is too much work, it is that simple. But then, as Y says she was told, some people manage it. Yes, some people do. So everyone should.
I feel guilty that I haven't been treated like this, and guilty that by "managing it" or seeming to, I can be pointed to by management who say, she can cope. What management say is realistic, is realistic. There is a power struggle, with management saying the workload is doable, and staff saying "It is not" but somehow seeming to cope. Those who do not seem to cope will suffer the consequences. The power struggle of whose definition of reality is valid.
This sparks off a kind of rage and helplessness.
It seems thoroughly unethical to me. To be able to give someone a bad reference after 3 months in a job which they have been dumped on and given an impossible workload...Making it difficult for them to move on.  Not to mention the fear that this management style induces in the whole team.
On the same day comes the news that Essex council have to pay millions in compensation to the victims of child abuse. Their social workers did not intervene to protect some children whose father was known to have abused other children and they were subject to years of abuse.
Of course that is very sad. But to penalize a council in that way, with the ripple effect on how its social workers are perceived and how social work is generally perceived...seems a strange response. Where does the buck stop? This culture of entitlement costs society very dear. That money could have gone into training, investment (possibly in more social workers) with a "good will payment" and public apology to the individuals, and support to help them rebuild their lives. Now I as a social worker know that any individual can sue my employer for my mistakes....And the motivation for the work becomes fear, not love. If I am not very careful!
I woke again at 4 am to write this. Not the best preparation for a day which includes two potentially difficult visits to clients one of whom has already shouted at me down the phone.
Do I feel centered?  Do I feel at peace?  It feels like, back to the real world with a bump. And yet....I talk about the other reality here.

Three Voices of a Social Worker

First Voice  "How wonderful to have a job helping people...especially helping children have a better life. Wow! I can go into work today and really make a difference to people's lives! Amazing! I'm really excited about that, and can't wait to get on with it. I can be creative, powerful and have a real impact. I can encourage parents who are struggling, challenge parents who are complacent or misguided, and if it's really necessary I can intervene and use the powers that be in local authorities and Courts to ensure that children have every possible chance of wellbeing and a great life. What a wonderful job, I love it, it's inspiring and a real privilege. How blessed am I . I want to learn everything I can about it, and be the best social worker that I can be. "

Second Voice. "It's a job, fairly much like any other. I'm accountable for my work, for the decisions I make, at least accountable to my  team manager. I understand the need to have adequate assessments which don't omit significant facts. I understand the need for them to be done in a timely way so that children aren't exposed to unnecessary suffering. I will do my best to complete initial assessments in timescales and with the best possible outcomes for children. It's a matter of being well organized and business like in how I do things. Having lists of what to do on each case, keeping up to date with recording, being child focussed. Sometimes it's a bit of a challenge but I'm getting there. I can cope if I remember to look after my own wellbeing too, and don't waste any time"

Third Voice.  "This is unbearable. I feel hemmed in and choked by the regulations and the nitpicking bureaucracy of the system. My life is hardly worth living as I scurry around like a rat in a maze trying to find the cheese. I hate working in an open plan office, where the only privacy is when I go to the loo. I am frightened that my team manager will pull my assessments apart, he has so little time to listen and doesn't want to hear me weighing things up, he'll want clarity about my decision and then he'll pick holes..

No one truly cares if children are actually happy and doing OK. It's all about covering your back.What matters is if the parent is not fitting in or complying in some way, the system is out to get them. And if I don't comply I'll be blamed and shamed as not good enough.

I am frightened I won't have the physical stamina. I resent having to see all children  alone and having no say as to whether that is necessary.  It means we  have to do the bulk of  visits after 3.30 and  7 or later.And we may not get the time back in time off, so our days can be from 9 am to 7 or 8pm. I am furious not to have control of my life, my time, to be owned by the system.!

I am being punished for something I have done, or not done, some failure of faith or courage. The penalty is to be living in an endless Kafkaesque nightmare. Social Work is a profession of slaves who are commanded and controlled by the system and in turn they do this to others.

The worst thing is that I am wasting my life. I could be doing something else, I should be doing something else with my life. My gifts, talents, passion, past experience and training are completely wasted doing this soulless social work. I hate myself for going along with it and the worst thing is I haven't the gumption to get out of it. There is no escape.I feel numb and despairing."

These are the three main voices in my head when I think about Social Work and my current job. I hear all of them at times. What a conflict! Which is the truth?  I don't know how to reconcile them, or if it's possible. The weird thing is that they are all valid!  I was tuned into the first voice some of the time this week,  then the busyness starts,and the second voice kicks in...By the end of Friday, the third voice was definitely the strongest. The busier I get the louder the third voice becomes and the less energy I have for the job. Is this only me, or is it true of anyone else? And is there another voice, which has something new to say? I hope so, let's see!

"Beginning your career as a social worker in London" written September 09

"Social workers provide support, encouragement, counselling and advice for individuals facing a life crisis - such as unemployment, mental illness, abuse, homelessness or disability - and who have been excluded from society as a result. In both London and the greater UK area, social workers are highly-qualified individuals who are keenly aware of the social, physical and emotional needs of their patients. These professionals use their skills and knowledge to help uplift the lives of those in their care, and reintegrate them into their communities."

This is a direct quote from a site that wishes to recruit social workers. Does it not sound great? Would it not appeal to anyone with a heart? Of course it will attract people into training as a social worker. I'd be tempted myself...if I wasn't rolling around the floor laughing instead.

Beware, beware, beware. Once again this week I and my colleagues have battled our way through a week on the frontline in a referral and assessment team. Yesterday, my brain simply went into gridlock. All of the above worthy aims and intentions might be possible, if I had half the work that I have. But I doubt it. I and every colleague I spoke to, feels desperately under pressure. Sure, some of the time I cope, but that does not mean that work is getting done.

And what is this work, exactly? Well on Monday I spent at least 5 hours filling in forms, filing, printing out data, photocopying and sorting out meeting dates and times. Work that I did not need any social work training whatsoever to do. Administrative tasks, that a sensible, averagely intelligent 18 year old could do. And the fact is, about 3 hours almost every day would need to be spent on such tasks, to keep up with the demands laid down by legislation.

Later in the week, I went to see a family which had a 6 year old boy just left with them by his mother. Under the regulations, the time I spent with the family was controlled by the requirements to complete a core assessment and do checks, eg 1hour was spent filling in CRB forms...So out of the 4 hours I spent with that family this week, how much was to "provide support, encouragement, counselling and advice"?

I would say, about 20 minutes. That included 10 minutes with the abandoned child and 10 minutes with the brand new carer, on her doorstep, after a lengthy interview controlled by bureaucratic demands. The time I left her home was 6.30pm, so I was not rushing to meet some finish by 5pm deain meeting the demands of the bureaucracy. Worse still, other clients will lose out because I cannot spread myself thinly enough to treat all of them in that way. I am adjusting to this, to the built in failure and shoddy work, but I won't endure it for long, especially now that it is eating away at my own sense of integrity.

So most days I do the juggling act, keeping as many balls as possible in the air, hoping I am not dropping the one that could be the next Baby Peter or Victoria....but with absolutely no certainty of that of course!

So far I am hanging in there, but please don't annoy me with  ridiculous rhetoric about uplifting lives and add hypocritical insult to the inevitable injury of staying on this soulless treadmill.

 More clearly than ever this week I see myself acting as a functionary, a cog in a huge machine. If I am true to myself, and treat my clients as fully human, then I simply will not succeed in meeting the demands of the bureaucracy. Worse still, other clients will lose out because I cannot spread myself thinly enough to treat all of them in that way. I am adjusting to this, to the built in failure and shoddy work, but I won't endure it for long, especially now that it is eating away at my own sense of integrity.So most days I do the juggling act, keeping as many balls as possible in the air, hoping I am not dropping the one that could be the next Baby Peter or Victoria....but with absolutely no certainty of that of course!So far I am hanging in there, but please don't annoy me with  ridiculous rhetoric about uplifting lives and add hypocritical insult to the inevitable injury of staying on this soulless treadmill.

I'd like to end with another quote: it's a definition of slavery:

"A slave is:

• • forced to work -- through mental or physical threat;
  • owned or controlled by an 'employer', usually through mental or physical abuse or threatened abuse;
  • dehumanised, treated as a commodity or bought and sold as 'property';
  • physically constrained or has restrictions placed on his/her freedom of movement."
  
  
  
  I know which quotation in this article  rings more true for me as a social worker in Britain 2009.

Back Again..Still Here!

I have changed roles since the last time I wrote. Now I am a social worker in Private Fostering. This is a system which came about following the death of Victoria Climbie. It seems the Government does not think it is good that a family makes its own decisions about children, who for whatever reason cannot be with their  own parents or very close relatives as defined by legislation. It isn't enough to do an assessment and make a decision about whether monitoring is needed or not. Monitoring must be done, regardless.

So today I visited a 15 year old boy from Afghanistan. He is living with his married cousin who has serious financial difficulties and asked for help to provide for the boy. I explain that there is no provision to make payments to families. They should provide for the boy from the family's resources. Or else.....
Ah now, there is the rub. What if the family decide that they can't make ends meet and request that the Borough find accommodation for him?

Well, then we can place him with foster carers. They might be of the same religous background, if there are any Muslim foster carers available.They will be professional carers, assessed, vetted, checked, trained, monitored and paid....to do the job of providing care in their home for a young person.

But wait a minute....What about listening to the wishes of the young person? "I want to stay with my cousin, but I want pocket money and I need clothes. I would miss my little cousins..." And it is my professional view that apart from the financial problems, this young person is well cared for at his current abode.

So we would really accommodate him, pay an allowance of £xxx per week, make a clothing grant and set in motion a whole Leaving Care process which will result in him having support until he is 18 and in acquiring a Council tenancy. Total cost....including social work time..£thousands.

We would rather do this than make any financial contribution to help a family to manage. Because....???they are family. They might harm the boy. We prefer to have him accommodated. No wonder the Borough is overspent...and just how would I explain this to the boy?